Spring Semester
By: Roy Ryder
Four wells several miles north of Pinebox have been closed due to contamination by deadly E. coli bacteria and the few residents in the area have been advised to boil their water until further notice. The contamination came to the attention of the Pinebox City water utility during their weekly sampling and the wells were shuttered immediately. No cases of sickness attributable to the bacteria have been reported in Golan County.
It is unknown how the wells became contaminated, although recent rains may have allowed contaminated material into the water. Gus Richardson, general manager of Pinebox city’s water utility, declined to say when the wells would no longer be dangerous. However, he did state that the city would attempt to disinfect the wells.
Eschericia coli is a natural bacteria that causes food poisoning and flu-like symptoms in those who drink contaminated water. The severity of the illness varies, but can be fatal to young children, the elderly, and those people with compromised immune systems.
Posted in Local News, Sophomore | No Comments »
Spring Semester
By: Thomas Alvarez
Police entered Hotel 96′ room 12 at 2pm this afternoon and arrested gas station attendant Martin Moore under suspicion of murder. According to hotel night clerk Ander Sangonstime, Moore checked into the room for the night with his girlfriend—Sally Pinid. Moore and Pinid were reported to have been intoxicated and had not been seen leaving their room once they had entered.
Sangonstime contacted Pinebox Police when attempts to remove Moore and Pinid from the motel room were unsuccessful. “My key didn’t work, and they weren’t answering to my yelling at them through the door,” said Sangonstime.
When Pinebox PD arrived they found that all doors and windows leading out of the room had been nailed shut. Police broke down the door to find Moore huddled in the far corner of the room. In a statement issued earlier this afternoon police noted that the room had several empty bottles of alcohol and no sign of where Pinid had gone. Moore was said to have been clutching a scrap of paper upon which he had written, “She went through the door and never came back” over and over again.
After speaking with the nighttime janitor of the motel, I was allowed a few minutes in the motel room. As reported by the police, all doors and windows had been nailed shut, but for some reason the door leading to the rooms bathroom had also been sealed similarly. Additionally, the cabinets and shelves were also nailed closed. The only door not sealed shut was the one leading into the room’s closet.
Posted in Local News | 1 Comment »
Spring Semester
By: Thomas Alvarez
Jerome Johnson
The individual arrested for his alleged involvement in an identity theft scandal that affected several ETU students and faculty was released today during his arraignment. In a closed courtroom, Jerome Johnson gave a brief statement before the judge and other courtroom officials. Shortly thereafter, Johnson was seen walking out of the courtroom without escort and permitted to leave the building.
After the hearing, public defender Louis Rainer spoke to the press outside the courthouse, “We simply had the wrong individual. Jerome Johnson was as much a victim of the recent identity theft scheme as many other Pinebox citizens were.” As it turns out, Jerome Johnson had had his identity infiltrated allowing the real criminal to plant a substantial amount of evidence leading Pinebox authorities to believe Johnson was responsible for the entire illegal operation. Rainer also noted that Johnson requested that he himself speak to the court in order to prove his innocence.
“Johnson’s presentation of his case was remarkable,” noted Rainer. “For a cryptography expert, Johnson was personable and easy to empathize with. In 14 minutes Judge Lindsay had ruled in Johnson’s favor and released him with the apologies of the court.”
While a transcript of the case was requested, court reporter David Bridges notified the Report that his electronic record was corrupted shortly after Judge Lindsay had made his ruling due to a power surge that ran through the building. Security recordings within the courthouse were also affected by the power surge causing their storage drives to be irreversibly damaged. The attached image is one of the few frames recovered from the damaged drives.
Johnson is believed to have returned to ETU to resume his graduate work. Pinebox authorities have resumed their investigations into the true identities of the thieves.
Tags: Identity Theft
Posted in Freshmen, Local News | No Comments »
Spring Semester
By: Thomas Alvarez
Students were shocked today when a naked freshman burst from the O’Brian Applied Sciences south elevator yesterday. Sean O’Malley exited the elevator on the second floor and ran clear across the hallway to the men’s bathroom, shrieking and screaming as he did so.
“I don’t see what the big deal is. Everyone’s stressed out, the kid just wanted to give everyone a laugh. To tell the truth, he didn’t look all too happy doing it either. Maybe Sigma Gamma’s hazing again.” noted junior civil engineering major Jesse Roberts.
Campus authorities detained O’Malley for the better part of the afternoon before he was released to his parents’ care. While details of O’Malley’s case could not be discussed for privacy reasons, the campus police saw fit to bring in the help of the Department of Student Health and Welfare to help manage the situation. Pinebox PD released a statement noting that O’Malley will not be charged.
Tags: Applied Sciences Power Loss
Posted in Local News, Senior | No Comments »
Fall Semester
By: Steve May
It’s that time of year again. Finals are here.
Most students suffer some stress from final anxiety, but some really have a difficult time adjusting.
“I throw up before every test,” reported Junior Tasha Pemberton, an English major. “I can’t sleep. I can’t eat, and I suffer dry heaves.”
“This is fairly common,” stated Dr. Lisa Carnes of the Psyche Department. “It is more common with Juniors and Seniors than with Freshmen and Sophomores. I think they just don’t understand how important that Grade Point Average is. It could cost you thousands of dollars in your future career.”
Mark Haynes, a Senior ROTC major, reviewed how he deals with test stress, “I eat lots of Nutter Butters and drink lots of chocolate milk.”
Other students report doing things like exercising, yoga, and one even reported resorting to witchcraft. “Say what you want, but it works,” stated the student, but she refused to give her name.
Dr. Carnes stated that the best thing to do is “get lots of sleep, drink lots of water, and eat healthy.” She also stated that exercise will help reduce the stress as well.
Anyone experiencing stress to the point of breaking needs to see the campus doctor and be referred to a psychologist or other specialist. “We want everyone to deal with this normal stress in a healthy manner,” Dr. Carnes said.
Posted in Freshmen, Local News | No Comments »
Fall Semester
By: Thomas Alvarez
ETU Mechanical Engineering major Susan Fong was reported missing on May 29th had Pinebox PD has yet to uncover any evidence as to her whereabouts. According to friends, Fong was seen as late as the morning of the 29th in and around the Applied Sciences building.
“Since she found the body a couple of weeks ago, Susie’s been hesitant to get onto any of the elevators in the building. And who could blame her?” noted Daniel Vasquez, friend of Fong’s and fellow engineering major. “But the last time I saw her, she was stepping into the North. I’d thought it was still taped off, but I guess I was wrong.”
Sheriff Butch Anderson commented on the situation: “Hard to go a month without an ETU kid going missing; especially this time of year with finals. No need to panic, she’s probably on a road trip with some girlfriends. We’ll find her one way or another.”
Students are requested to share any information as to the whereabouts of Susan Fong with ETU campus authorities or the Pinebox Police department.
Tags: Applied Sciences Power Loss
Posted in Junior, Local News | No Comments »
